Friday, September 29, 2006

They say that weirdness starts with family and friends.
Hmm. Now that's food for thought.
Does it really?
Let me see:

1) I have a father who is tone-deaf (I am so sorry Daddy. BUT THAT SONG DID IT. oh, my ears.) and has a delayed reaction time of five minutes.

FIG. 1

SETTING: Dining Area.

Me: Hi Daddy.
Daddy: (using laptop)...
Me: (walks to kitchen)
Daddy: ...
Me: (scavenges around for food)
Daddy: ...
Me: (makes milo)
Daddy: ...
Me: (takes milo and walks out of kitchen)
Daddy: Oh, hi Anni.


2) I have a mother who changes the subject at the most random moments without even batting an eyelid. She also thinks that most men nowadays are sissified.

FIG. 2A

SETTING: COLD STORAGE.

Me: (runs over very very happily) Mummmy, guess what! Daddy said that he would get me that book I was asking for!
Mumsy: Aiyo. This queue is SO slow.
(Proceeds to walk away from me without even acknowledging my presence.)

FIG. 2B

SETTING: In the car by the zebra crossing.

(Man saunters in a gay sort of way across the zebra crossing)
Mumsy: (frustrated sigh) Men nowadays. NO BALLS I TELL YOU.
Me: (O.O) WHAT TH-!

3) I have a uber-good-friend who is willing to forage through Amazonian rainforests, chop her way through the thick undergrowth, forde slushy swamps and live out in the wilderness. Yet she screams at the sight of a beetle.

FIG. 3

SETTING: At West Coast Park.

June: (talk about how going through the Amazon sucked but was uber cool anyway)
Me: Whoa. That's so cool.
June: Haha. Thanks. But crossing the rivers was pretty OH MY GOD IS THAT A BEETLE SHITSHITSHIT AHHHHHHH GET IT AWAY QUICK HURRYHURRYHURRY DAMNIT DON'T BRING IT NEAR ME STUPID @#$%^& AUGH!!

4) I have a friend who wears (his) girl(friend)'s t-shirts and proudly parades around his house in them. He then takes a picture of himself (courtesy of said girlfriend, though somewhat reluctantly) for keepsake (or rather to annoy me).
FIG 4.

SETTING: His room (where the computer is).

Ben: Hello, Anni. {nickname deleted to preserve sanity safety.}
Me: (busy playing a game) Hi.
Ben: Hey, look at this! (brandishes camera phone with his picture on it)
Me: (squints) That's one heck of a tight shirt.
Ben: Yup. It's my girlfriend's. (wide grin)
Me: O.O *facepalm*

(other reasons were not put up on this blog to protect my family's and friend's humility and my sanity.)
Hey. So it does start with family and friends!
Now how about that. I have a valid reason to be weird.

NOW YOU SHALL ALL FEAR ME!

A Beautiful Disaster at Friday, September 29, 2006